Ahhh... The Coin Machine

i wish that the lowest form of currency was the one dollar bill... that no coin existed... that everything was just rounded off to the nearest dollar.

we really need a sign up in our branch that states the following:

"if you want us to run your loose change through our coin machine, please make sure that the following standards are met...

your coin:

1. is from the U.S. (no, Canada does not count)
2. is actually money... no Chucky Cheese tokens, etc.
3. is not in a coke bottle... yes, pennies fit perfectly into the opening, but it's extremely difficult to get them back out. it's a lot of work for $.50
4. is not in a large jar partially filled with stagnant water.... why? because that's just gross and we don't like it
5. is not mixed with pet fur, hair, jewelry, dirt, balls of lint, or other nasty things that can't even be identified

thank you for your cooperation!"